Today is the day I quit Mongolian Sign Language Classes.

I hated quitting, but a few weeks into a 6 week class I got a virus (probably Covid but I was never officially diagnosed). The school was AMAZING and I had one one-on-one online make-up lesson and another where I participated live on Zoom. But after two weeks of being sick and recovering I’m still not fully myself, I’m feeling stressed about something that was once fun, and I have limited energy and I need to focus elsewhere.

I’m proud that I started the class.

I’m proud for every lesson I went to where I understood only a fraction of what was being said but did it anyway.

I’m proud of learning the alphabet in one night.

I’m proud of taking a risk.

And I’m proud of quitting something in order to keep my head above water elsewhere.

I’ve struggled to appreciate my limits. I tend to think if I try harder I can figure out how to make it all work out. The perfect formula eludes me when there’s too much on my plate. And today I acknowledged a limit, that considering I’ve been sick there is too much on my plate, and quit a thing.

I hope to start studying again someday. The teachers were great, the lessons were some of the most strategic and pedagogically sound I’ve experienced in a while, and it was fun. I like speaking with my hands and love the idea of being able to communicate with a marginalized group. But the time is not right and so I quit a thing.

Mongolian Sign Language: Монгол Дохионы Хэл